Wife argues on husbands job and no cash

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

The question is that wife and I have 4 girls and been married for 16 years. I have been working on and off and we seem to argue over my employment. I do claim Job centre allowance and have recently found a teaching job. She says I dont give her any amount of cash and that next year I will move to Argentina because I am a teacher, she says that I am neglecting my duties. Also I have been paying off my debts which I had a couple of years ago and I have been selfish. I am not been selfish because I will be saving more in Argentina and that amount will go to the kids. Lastly I am a qualified teacher and I am not really bothered how much I get paid but I think shes bothered about the money and thinks I am stubborn. I think its the end of the road and I rather have a divorce and thats it. I am a bit immature in a way that I ignore her after we have a argument. Please can you give me a logical explanation.

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Answer:

Wife argues on husbands job and no cash

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Brother you are a teacher by profession and maybe your wife is giving you a hard time because you do not earn enough. You have the responsibility of your wife and 4 daughters and you should not even think about throwing in the towel and talking about divorce. That is totally un-Islamic and a very defeatist attitude.

With hikmah (wisdom), patience and understanding you have to go through this trial and save your marriage. In anger and hurry you can cause a lot of grief for yourself and your young family. The responsibility is wholly on your shoulders and you have to stoically bear the same.

So be kind and understanding with your wife and persistently try and make her understand your problems and InshaAllah she will see the benefits for all the family. You have to control your anger and make an effort to listen more and quarrel less.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is only ones. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brothers and well wishers in Islam,

 

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