Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

as-saalam-alaikum

i was wondering if there is any aayat or hadies in quran that it says. not to have sex with ur wife in different position. and give or take oral sex with them. is it allowed to do dat or no. i mean she is ur wife. should it be allowed to do unless the wife dont want to. plz let me knw
jazakallah

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Answer:

Position and sex

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verses 222-223:

222 They ask thee concerning women's courses. Say: ‘They are a hurt and a pollution; so keep away from women in their courses and do not approach them until they are clean. But when they have purified themselves ye may approach them in any manner time or place ordained for you by Allah. For Allah loves those who turn to Him constantly and He loves those who keep themselves pure and clean.’

223 Your wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth when or how ye will. But do some good act for your souls beforehand; and fear Allah and know that ye are to meet Him (in the Hereafter) and give (these) good tidings to those who believe.

Islam has allowed the husband and the wife in marriage every possible liberty to enjoy conjugal relations with each other, except three:

1. It is strictly prohibited to have sexual intercourse with one’s wife during her period of menstruation.
2. It is strictly prohibited to enter the woman through her anus.
3. Although there is no specific prohibition mentioned in the Quran and Sunnah, the majority of the scholars in Islam have voiced their opinion against ‘oral’ sex, whereby one touches the other’s private organs with their mouth.

Other than the above three restrictions, one may enjoy conjugal relations with one’s wife any place, any time, and any how their heart’s desire.

Your Question: i was wondering if there is any aayat or hadies in quran that it says. not to have sex with ur wife in different position.

My beloved brother, provided the above listed three conditions are not violated, the husband and the wife can enjoy their conjugal relations with each other in any position they wish…standing, sitting, lying down, on the sides, on one leg, in the air….any possible position they can imagine or desire….provided the above listed three restrictions are honored, there is absolutely no restriction, nor prohibition regarding positions and ways of intercourse between a husband and a wife in their sacred union of marriage.

Your Question: and give or take oral sex with them. is it allowed to do dat or no. i mean she is ur wife. should it be allowed to do unless the wife dont want to.

Dear and Beloved Brother in Islam, it is obvious that the act of ‘oral sex’, whereby one spouse derives pleasure by touching the private parts of the other with their mouth is obviously unnatural, unhealthy, unhygienic, unclean, impure and this act is not found even in any of the lower animate creations!

Because oral sex is a new deviation of mankind, it finds mention neither in the Quran nor the Sunnah, just as there is no mention of the permissibility/impermissibility of man deriving pleasure by trying to enter the woman through her nose, ears, navel, etc.!!!

But since the permissibility/impermissibility of this specific act of what is known today as ‘oral sex’ is not mentioned by name or act anywhere in the Quran and the Sunnah, the God-fearing and the pious amongst the scholars in Islam have abstained from declaring it ‘haraam’; the most they have said is that the act is from the ‘khabaaith’ (impure) and thus closer to the haraam than to the halaal, and the believers should fear Allah and abstain from it.

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 3.267 Narrated by An Numan bin Bashir

The Prophet (saws) said "Both the halaal (lawful) and the haraam (unlawful) things are (made) obvious, and in between them are (suspicious) doubtful matters. So whoever forsakes those doubtful things lest he may commit a sin, will definitely avoid what is clearly unlawful; and whoever indulges in these (suspicious) doubtful things bravely, is likely to commit what is clearly illegal. Sins are Allah's Hima (i.e. private pasture) and whoever pastures (his sheep) near it, is likely to get in it at any moment."

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan