He asking about the proper Islamic way to celebrate weddings
Celebrating weddings is a celebration that is prescribed in sharee’ah, because it is a great blessing from Allaah, Who has enabled the couple to find a means of happiness and a way to achieve modesty and chastity. People have always expressed their joy for this blessing since ancient times and they still do so today, and that takes various forms and involves different customs in different societies and countries.
The aim of Islamic sharee’ah is not to put pressure on people with regard to their customs or try to make them follow only one custom, rather studying sharee’ah will show that with regard to customs the matter is broad in scope and in principle customs are permissible, with some limits and guidelines.
The Muslim is recommended to follow the customs of his people and he is forbidden to go against them, so long as they do not go against the rulings of sharee’ah or cause any hardship or embarrassment to people. The scholars ruled that it is recommended to be similar to the people in their customs by analogy with the ruling that it is recommended to be similar to them in dress. There is a hadeeth concerning that which forbids being different from people in dress so that one becomes known among people for the way he dresses. It was narrated that Ibn ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever wears a garment of fame and vanity, Allaah will clothe him in a garment of humiliation on the Day of Resurrection.”
Narrated by Ibn Majaah (3606); classed as hasan by Shaykh al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Majaah.
Fame and vanity in clothing means wearing something that is extraordinarily expensive or extraordinarily ragged. The salaf disliked both kinds of standing out: wearing expensive clothing or wearing ragged clothing.
It says something similar in Majmoo’ al-Fataawa by Ibn Taymiyah (22/138).
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in al-Sharh al-Mumti’ (6/115):
We must highlight this point, that going along with customs so long as they are not haraam is the Sunnah, because going against customs is a kind of vanity, and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade the dress of fame and vanity, so that which goes against customs is also forbidden. End quote.
Hence we advise you to hold a wedding celebration and we ask Allaah to bless it. You should do it in accordance with the custom and tradition of people in your country, and you should not try to cast off all of their customs. All that you have to do is reject and avoid those customs that are haraam, such as using music – apart from the daff – and mixing between men and women. For more information please see question no. 11446.
There are many more things that are permissible – praise be to Allaah – than those that are haraam. Singing that is not accompanied by music, making food, bringing people together, wearing adornments are all things that are permitted by sharee’ah, so use whatever of those things you think is appropriate and that people like and ask Allaah to guide you in all of that.
And Allaah knows best.