Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

I had been to UK to do a M.Sc in Computing and was there for 3.5 years with my family. During this time, I worked temporarily in 3 or 4 jobs, all were halal and I took breaks for prayer also Alhamdulillah.

But I cud not find a permanent job, so we all had to return to India as we could not get enough points to qualify for a permanent visa. During this time my wife was working in a clinic as administrator, manager etc. for more than 2 years. Before getting this job, she used to work as a nanny with a North Indian family, where she used to cook and feed their baby with bacon and she used to used to serve alcoholic drinks to them at home as well as the pub.

She tells my 8 year old daughter that I will be the one to bear the sins for feeding bacon and serving alcoholic drinks, since she says I was lazy enough to look for a job, whereas in reality, due to bad luck, I cud not find one despite trying so much, and I was particular about the job being halal and taking breaks for prayer.

So even if we assume that I, the husband was lazy to look for a job, does it mean that I will be responsible for the sins of my wife for serving bacon and alcohol. She says that she did this job out of desperation to run my family and I told her so many times abt Allah mentioning in the Quran that He will provide for our means for one who is aware of his duty to Allah. Yet she does not admit that she is wrong, she says that I will be the one to bear the sins. The Holy Quran also mentions that one will not bear the sins of another.

Can you kindly clarify whether I will be responsible for my wife`s haraam job? Thank you and regards. 

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Husband allows wife to do unlawful

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

The truth is that even if a husband commands or forces his wife to do anything which is specifically prescribed as ‘haraam’ or unlawful by Allah Subhanah and His Messenger (saws)….the wife is not to obey this command of her husband, if indeed she fears Allah and The Last Day.

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3696 Narrated by An-Nawwas ibn Sam'an

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "A creature is not to be obeyed when it involves disobedience to the Creator."

Respected brother in Islam, instead of you striving to make your wife admit to her error, or your wife striving to blame you for what she did….prudence and intelligence dictates that the both of you should turn unto your Lord Most Gracious and sincerely seek His forgiveness for whatever happened….it is expected that you will find your Lord Forgiving and Merciful.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 39 Surah Zumur verses 53-54:

(O Prophet) say: “O My servants who have wronged their own souls….Do not despair of Allah’s Mercy! Surely, Allah forgives all sins. He indeed is the All Forgiving, All Merciful. Return to your Lord and submit to Him before the scourge overtakes you; for then you may get no help from anywhere.”

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah Ale Imraan verse 135-136:

Allah likes such good people very much, who, if ever they commit a base deed or wrong their own soul by the commission of a sin, remember Allah instantly, and ask for forgiveness from Him for their shortcomings. For who, but Allah, can forgive sins? (And Allah loves those) who do not knowingly persist in the wrongs they did. These will be rewarded with forgiveness from Allah, and with Gardens beneath which canals flow, and they will reside therein forever! How excellent is the reward of those who do good deeds!

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 6 Surah Anaam verse 54:

When those come to you who believe in Our Signs, say: "Peace be on you! Your Lord had inscribed for Himself (the rule of) Mercy. Verily if any of you did evil in ignorance, and thereafter repented and amended (his conduct), Lo! He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful."

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 2357 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Mas'ud

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "He who repents of a sin is like him who has committed no sin."

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 2338 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Umar

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "Allah accepts a servant's repentance (taubah) till he gives up his spirit in death."

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 2339 Narrated by Abu Sa'id

Allah's Messenger (saws) said that the Shaytaan said, "By Thy Might, my Lord, I shall continue to lead Thy servants astray as long as their spirits are in their bodies!" The Lord, Who is Great and Glorious, replied, "By My Might, Glory and Exalted Station, I shall continue to pardon them as long as they ask My forgiveness!"

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan