Divorce a good husband.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
Al Salam Alleikum wa rahmat Allah,
I`ve been married for the past 3 years to a very good man. He is a good, decent, religious, kind, hard-working and generous husband who is extremely loving and decent to me and my family. In short, he is perfect.
At the time when I decided to marry him, I knew that I was not completely in love with him but agreed to the marriage as I know that getting married is better for a young muslim woman (I was 23 years old at the time). I also chose to proceed with this marriage on the basis that I received undue attention from male friends and colleagues at work and wanted all this to stop so that I do not commit any sins.
Shortly after our marriage, I felt that I made a mistake. While I respect and love him "in a friendly way" I do not really love him in the way that a wife should love her husband.
I am a successful working woman and believe in Allah subhanou wa ta3ala and have already performed farida al Hajj, however, I am now 28 years old and feel that I cant continue in a one sided relationship anymore. I think that I will be a happier person if I got a divorce, however, I cannot imagine the pain that I would cause my husband, my family and his family in the process (especially since he is a perfect husband who has not hurt me in any way). I already feel guilty just considering it.
Can you please give me some guidance from an Islamic perspective?
(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)
Divorce a good husband
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
The sacred bond of marriage in Islam is a contract which both the parties have a right to dissolve whenever they wish to do so.thus you are well within your rights in Islam to seek a divorce in your marriage, if indeed you wish to do so.
Rather than guide you one way or the other, what we can do for you here is present some quotations from the Quran and the Sunnah, and it is entirely up to you to decide whether you wish to exercise your right to seek divorce or not .
Allah Says in the Holy
Quran Chapter 30 Surah
21 And among His Signs is this that He created for you mates from among yourselves that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts); verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 1.28 Narrated by Ibn Abbas
The Prophet (saws) said: "I was shown the Hell-Fire and that the majority of its dwellers were women who were ungrateful." It was asked, "Do they disbelieve in Allah?" (or are they ungrateful to Allah?) He (saws) replied, "They are not thankful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favors done to them. Even if you do good to one of them all your life, when she seems some harshness from you, she will say, "I have never seen any good from you!"
Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2218 Narrated by Thawban
The Prophet (saws)
said: If any woman asks her husband for divorce without some strong reason,
(even) the odour of
Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2173 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Umar
The Prophet (saws) said: Of all the lawful acts the most detestable to Allah is divorce.
Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2172 Narrated by Muharib
The Prophet (saws) said: Allah did not make anything lawful more abominable to Him than divorce.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisaa verse 19 (part):
It may be that ye dislike a thing and Allah brings about through it a great deal of good.
216 But it is possible that ye dislike a thing which is good for you and that ye love a thing which is bad for you. But Allah Knows and ye know not.
If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any other guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of being led astray.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,