We are both not comfortable with the fact that any of the family know we have slept together.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
I heard in a speech in the mosque
That during ramadhan - A husband can have a sex with his wife during the night - get up for suhoor - pray the FASTING niyyat - without yet having the ghusl so far.
We live with our extended family and its embarassing for both of us to go for a shower before fajr - we are both not comfortable with the fact that any of the family know we have slept together.
yet we both don't want to miss our fajr. Can we wake up at normal 7am working hours wakeup time and then have our ghusl and pray our fajr - is this accepted in such circumstances?
Whats the exact rule and how does it work in ramadhan?
looking forward to your reply....
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Sex during Ramadan
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Ghusl or full bath for purity after sex is not obligatory for a person to be able to make intention to fast, cook, or eat, or leave the house, or do any other deed except visiting the mosques, prayer, and the recitation of the Quran.
Although it is highly recommended that one purify oneself immediately after sexual intercourse, there is evidence and allowance in the Sunnah if one wishes to sleep, eat, or drink or do other chores before purifying oneself, one must at least do the wudu or ablution.
If one does not perform the ghusl immediately after sex for any reason, it would be better and purer to perform the wudu (ablution) and go about ones chores or duties, and perform the ghusl later when one intends to pray or recite the Quran.
Sahih Muslim Hadith 603 Narrated by Aisha
Abdullah ibn AbdulQays said, "I asked Aisha about the Witr (prayer) of the Messenger of Allah (saws) and made mention of a hadith, then I said: What did he (saws) do after having sexual intercourse? Did he take a bath before going to sleep or did he sleep before taking a bath? She said: He (saws) did all these. Sometimes he (saws) took a bath and then slept, and sometimes he (saws) performed ablution only and went to sleep. I (the narrator) said: Praise be to Allah Who has made things easy (for the believers in the deen).
Thus if a husband and wife enjoined in the sacred institution of marriage enjoy conjugal relations with each other during the night of Ramadan, there is absolutely no harm if they make the intention to fast the next day, get up for and consume suhoor, etc. before they have purified themselves from their state of major impurity through ghusl or full bath.but it is highly recommended and a Sunnah that if they delay their ghusl for any reason whatsoever, they should perform the wudu or ablution.
One indeed need not be in the state of purity to start ones fast, but one would need to be in the state of purity to offer ones prayers; for being in the state of purity is indeed one of the obligatory preconditions of prayer in Shariah.
Question: yet we both don't want to miss our fajr. Can we wake up at normal 7am
working hours wakeup time and then have our ghusl and pray our fajr - is this
accepted in such circumstances?
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisaa verse 103:
Indeed the Salaat is a prescribed duty that should be performed by the believers at (their) appointed times.
Intentionally missing an obligatory prayer is not even given as an option in the deen of Islam! If one accidentally or unintentionally misses ones prayer through sleep or forgetfulness, one should pray it as soon as one wakes up or remembers it.
One should strive as hard as one can to make intention to offer ones obligatory prayers on their appointed times, and if Allah forbid, one misses a prayer, then the absolute least one can do is expiate and atone for that lapse by praying it qada in the sincere fear and hope that the Lord Most High will accept it.
Whoever sleeps through or has forgotten to pray a certain prayer should pray it when he wakes up or remembers the prayer. Abu Qatadah related that sleeping through the prayer time was mentioned to the Prophet (saws) and he said, "There is no negligence in sleep, but negligence occurs while one is awake. If one of you forgets a prayer or sleeps through its time, then he should pray it when he remembers it."
Related by an-Nasa'i and at-Tirmidhi.
Anas related that the Prophet (saws) said, "Whoever forgets a prayer should pray it when he remembers it, and there is no expiation for it save that."
Related by al-Bukhari and Muslim.
Beloved brother, it would simply not behove one who sincerely believes in Allah and the Last Day to intentionally delay the offering of their obligatory prayers beyond its appointed time; and it would be your duty to do whatever it takes to make sure that both you and your wife do not miss or delay the performance of your obligatory prayersespecially for as frivolous a reason as not comfortable with the fact that any of the family know we have slept together.
Abu Dhar al-Ghafari reported: The Messenger of Allah (saws) said: there is a reward for you [even] in sex with your wife." The companions asked: O Messenger of Allah (saws) is there a reward if one satisfies his passion?" He (saws) said: "Do you know that if he satisfies it unlawfully he has taken a sin upon himself? Likewise, if he satisfies it lawfully, he is rewarded."
Related by Ahmad and Muslim.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,