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And if he dissaproves, do we still get married or do we end it?

Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)


One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

i have reverted to Islam about a year ago and i have met this muslim man and we wish to marry. but he is scared to ask his father because i am not from the same country and i have a disability and cannot walk or lift. he says that his father wouldnt approve. what do i do if his father dissapproves? And if he dissaproves, do we still get married or do we end it? 


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Approval of grooms Father

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.


Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 25 Surah Furqaan verse 54:

54 It is He (Allah) Who has created man from water: then has He established relationships of lineage (blood) and of marriage: for thy Lord has Power (over all things).


Beloved Sister in Islam, a marriage in Islam is not a mere union of two individuals, but rather a union between two families..and although the consent of the grooms father is not amongst the obligatory and prescribed conditions of an Islamic Nikaah to be lawful in Shariah Law, it would only be considered piety and righteousness for the groom to seek and obtain his fathers/parents approval to his choice in marriage. Islam guides that neither should a righteous and God-fearing child marry someone without the approval of their parents, nor should the parents refuse the choice of their children without an absolutely valid and just reason.


If after ones very best and polite efforts, the father/parents of the groom still disapprove of the choice of the girl their son seeks to marry.the decision is left entirely unto the boy..


Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 17 Surah Bani Israel verses 23-24:

Your Lord has enjoined the following: You should not worship anyone but Him Alone! Treat your parents with great kindness; if either or both of them attain old age, do not even say uff (a word of contempt) to them; nor rebuke them; but speak to them kind words. Treat them with humility and tenderness and pray, O our Lord, be merciful to them, just as they brought me up with kindness and affection in my childhood.


Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 4941 Narrated byAbu Umamah

A man said, "O Messenger of Allah (saws) what rights can parents demand from their children?" He (saws) replied, "They are (or your relation with them will determine) your Paradise and your Hell!"


If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any other guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of being led astray.


Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.


Your brother and well wisher in Islam,




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