Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

hello i just wanted to know that is dowry haram in islam. isnt it a hindu ritual. and if it is then why have we muslims taken it from them. they say tht the man should take care of all the wedding expenses and whtever the girls parents give her should be taken as a gift adn not dowry. i dont how much of all thsi is true but if u could pls clarify this i would be really grateful because i personally dont believe in dowry. thank you

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Is dowry haraam in Islam?

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His  forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad(saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

The English term dowry according to the Oxford Dictionary means ‘the property or money brought by a bride to her husband.’

Your question: i just wanted to know that is dowry haram in islam. isnt it a hindu ritual.

The Shariah term ‘mehr’ is translated into dowry, but does not have the same connotation. In Islam, it is an obligatory condition of marriage that the man fix and pay an amount to his wife, according to his means or according to his wife’s demand, at the time of marriage as a gift.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisaa verse 4: And give the women (on marriage) their dower as a free gift; but if they of their own good pleasure remit any part of it to you , take it and enjoy it with right good cheer.

This Mehr is a right of the wife, and she may spend it as she wills. It is impermissible for the husband to demand the mehr back, or take it away from his wife after his marriage, or if he divorces her or marries again; but if of her own free will and good pleasure, the wife wishes to share the mehr amount with her husband, there is no harm.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisaa verses 20-21:

20 But if ye decide to take one wife in place of another, even if ye had given the latter a whole treasure for dower, take not the least bit of it back: would ye take it by slander and a manifest wrong?

21 And how could ye take it when ye have gone in unto each other, and they have taken from you a solemn covenant?

In the Hindu ritual and culture, the exact opposite is done. The husband demands the dowry and the wife and her parents have to pay it! But in Islam, the wife does not have to pay one single cent, but rather she has been given the right to demand and receive the ‘mehr’ as a condition of marriage.

Your question: and if it is then why have we muslims taken it from them.

The wife and her family being extorted for amounts of dowry might be a Hindu ritual and customs, and has nothing to do with Islam.

In Islam, the man is required to bear and pay all the expenses of the marriage, including ‘mehr’ to his wife.

Your question: they say tht the man should take care of all the wedding expenses and whtever the girls parents give her should be taken as a gift adn not dowry.

Indeed, all the financial responsibilities of the marriage, the walima or marriage feast, the ‘mehr’, etc. is the responsibility and duty of the man. The woman will not have to spend even one cent on the marriage!

Although they do not have any obligations whatsoever, if the girl’s parents, absolutely of their own free will and without any open or secret coercion, wish to give something to their daughter and her husband; they may accept and enjoy it.

But if the husband or his family put any sort of open or secret pressure and extort any gifts out of the girl’s parents or family, it would be just like following the pagan ‘dowry’ system, and they will have to give a severe accounting in the Court of Allah Subhanah for their extortion! The pagan Hindu system or culture of ‘dowry’ whereby the man or his family demands money or gifts from the girl’s family has absolutely no basis or place in the deen of Islam.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your Brother in Islam,

Burhan