We are gujarati family settled in canada. recently my father`s sister expired. so my cousin had khatam qurankhani.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
dear brother in islam
we are gujarati family settled in canada. recently my father`s sister expired. so my cousin had khatam qurankhani. he has invited all the close relatives. everyone came for reciting the quran. i was also present there but didnot read the quran for the deceased. i felt it is wrong so i didnot join them.
brother pls. guide me in this situation what should i do. they all know why i didnot participate. i always tell them. my sister from bahrain sends me your forward. pls. help me in this awkward situation how do i face them.
i am using my sister`s e-mail address. pls. send the reply with the same address. she will fax me.
dear brother Burhan
regarding khatam quran of my aunt i told my family in canada and america, it is wrong. how can i convince them. pls. help me to answer my sister in canada as per quran and sunna. she is waiting for my answer to the point which i am sending below:
your answer in this matter will be appreciated. hope to hear from you soon.
comments from my sister in canada:
Actually, this is subsequent to my discussion with you. I do believe in Khatams etc, so does my husband. The point that he made is if you can make Hajj for a Marhoom (deceased), why not duaas. So, how or why is Hajj permitted for Marhooms. How does the sawaab of Hajj reaches, and not the sawaab of Quran.
Having Kuran Khani etc. for a deceased is no gunaah. Should anyone die in the family, I will have it. It is acceptable religion wise as well as socially - as you mentioned it can be served as a gathering point and all of us gather to grieve the dead (you do believe that we should go to do taaziyat for the deceased), so why not gather and pray. Praying is never forbidden - in a group or otherwise.
Also, I clarified with two people (fairly knowledgeable ones - ), and they confirmed that you can pray for the dead, but through the wasila of our Pyare Nabi (and please don`t pounce on me yet - we are not asking for from the Prophet, but through the wasila) and pray for our Nabi first, all Muslims, and then pray for our beloved deceased. And it is acceptable - and this has been confirmed by Aalims as well. When we pray for the deceased, what happens is their barzak becomes easier, the azaab lessens. Of course, your own good deed will take priority.
See sister, you should not believe at face value what the Arabs say. It is not necessary that whatever they do is right - a very good example is the applying of nail polish when praying. Most Arabs do that ( at least the ones I have seen - bahrain and canada). If your nail is covered in a film of polish, the wudu is void. But most Arabs do it, it does not mean it is right and we can emulate them.
I guess people want this khatams etc. discouraged, in order to encourage being self sufficient naeki wise, and not rely on other people. Also, all in all, if the sawaab does not reach the dead, it will be retained for you, so what the heck, just pray, and in a group it is faster and even those people who don`t normally pray, will pray at such times.
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Innovation bida quran khani
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Your Question: regarding khatam quran of my aunt i told my family in canada and america, it is wrong. how can i convince them. pls. help me to answer my sister in canada as per quran and sunna.
Beloved Sister, first and foremost, allow us to explain which acts and rites of worship are acceptable to the Lord Most Gracious as worship; and which acts and rites constitute a bida or innovation in the deen.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 33 Surah Ahzab verse 21:
There is indeed the best example for you to follow in the Messenger of Allah, for every such person looks forward to Allah and the Last Day, and remembers Allah much.
Dear and Beloved sister in Islam, it is the solemn belief of every true believer who sincerely fears Allah and the Last Day, that there was, is, or never will be anyone in the annuls of creation who worshipped Allah Subhanah more or better than the Noble Last and Final Messenger of Allah, Mohamed ar-Rasool Allah (saws)!
Any and every act or rite of worship which was performed by the Messenger of Allah (saws) himself, or he (saws) allowed or encouraged or endorsed it, then those acts and deeds of worship alone are acceptable to Allah Subhanah.
If one were to invent a new act or new rite of worship in Islam when the Messenger of Allah (saws) has not endorsed it, then such an act or rite will constitute a clear and manifest bida or innovation in the pure and perfect deen of Islam. Every single innovation in the pure and perfect deen of Islam is an error, and a grave sin in the Sight of Allah Subhanah.
Aisha narrated that the Messenger of Allah (saws) said: If somebody innovates something which is not present in our religion, then that thing will be rejected.
Related by Bukhari.
Sahih Muslim Hadith 1885 Narrated by Jabir ibn Abdullah
That the Prophet of Allah (saws) said in a sermon: The best speech is that which is embodied in the Book of Allah, the Al Quran; and the best guidance is the guidance given by me, Mohamed (saws). The most evil affairs are the innovations (bida), and every innovation (bida) is an error.
Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 4515 Narrated by Ali ibn AbuTalib
That the Prophet of Allah (saws) said: If anyone introduces an innovation (bida in religion), he will be responsible for it. If anyone introduces an innovation (bida) or gives shelter to a man who introduces an innovation (bida), he is cursed by Allah, by His Angels, and by all the people!
A bida or innovation is something which is invented, innovated, and added to the deen of Islam after the deen was completed on Prophet Mohamed (saws). It especially concerns the rites and rituals of worship, or any deed which was not performed or endorsed by the Messenger of Allah (saws), but was added as a part of the deen after his (sawss) death. It also concerns any innovated deed which one does and believes that by doing this innovated deed, he is eligible to earn more reward from Allah Subhanah.
Thus before accepting or following any act or rite of worship in the deen, a believer who sincerely fears Allah and the Last Day must ask and determine only one question:
DID THE MESSENGER OF ALLAH (SAWS) ENDORSE THIS ACT AS A RITE OF WORSHIP???
If the answer is yes, one may do so in the manner prescribed without stint.
If the answer is no, then this act or rite has to be an innovation, and it must be immediately rejected by the believers.
Your Question: regarding khatam quran of my aunt i told my family in canada and america, it is wrong. how can i convince them. pls. help me to answer my sister in canada as per quran and sunna.
Beloved Sister in Islam, the reciting, studying, learning, memorizing and understanding of the Glorious Quran is, without an iota of a doubt, a great and absolutely meritorious deed in the Sight of Allah Subhanahand Allah is our witness, no matter how much one tries or strives, one can never say he/she has done justice to the recitation, or learning, or studying of the Glorious Words of Allah Subhanah. Except when one is in the state of ceremonial impurity, one is permitted and encouraged in Islam to recite and learn the Glorious Quran as much as ones heart desires.
Thus it is not the recitation of the Glorious Quran which (Allah forbid) is being challenged, but it is the innovated rite of the so-called khatam Quran which is done at a loved ones death, that is being questioned!
The Prophet (saws) during his own lifetime witnessed many deathsfrom amongst his own family, from amongst his noble companions, the martyrs, etc. Now lets ask ourselves these question:
- At the death of any believer, is there any evidence in the authentic and established Sunnah that the Messenger of Allah (saws) would gather the believers for the sole purpose of reciting the full Quran and transferring the rewards of their recitation of the Quran to the deceased???
- Or at the death of any loved one, did the Messenger of Allah (saws) ever gather the poor and needy, feed or clothe them, and try to transfer the reward to the deceased???
Abu Hurairah reported, "The Prophet (saws) said, 'When a person dies all his good deeds cease except for three:
- a continuous act of charity (which the deceased did in his lifetime),
- beneficial knowledge (which the deceased left behind),
- and a righteous son (children) who supplicates for him'.''
Related by Muslim and Abu Dawood.
Abu Hurairah reported, "The Prophet (saws) said, 'The righteous works that continue to benefit a believer after his death include the knowledge that he taught and spread among others, a righteous son (children) whom he leaves behind, or a copy of the Qur'an that he bequeaths to his inheritors, or a mosque that he builds, or a rest house that he builds for the wayfarers, or a canal of water that he digs for the benefit of others, or a charity that he gives out of his property during his life while he is sound of health. He will continue to receive reward for all these even after his death.'
Related by Ibn Maajah.
When the Messenger of Allah (saws) did not endorse such a gathering on a loved ones death where the Quran was recited, or the poor was fed and clothed, etc.; then how on earth did this so-called rite and ritual of Khatam Quran become a part of worship or Islam???
Lets take some other scenarios:
- Fasting in Islam is considered a great virtue in Islam.lets say someone invented a rite and called upon a gathering at a loved ones death, and asked everyone in the gathering to fast for 3 or 7 or 10 or 40 days and transfer the rewards to the deceased??? Can such a self-invented rite or ritual which is not endorsed by the Messenger of Allah be considered a part of worship in Islam??? Will such a rite be acceptable to Allah Subhanah as worship???
- Reciting the durood on the Prophet (saws) is considered a great virtue in Islam. lets say someone invented a rite or ritual and called upon a gathering at a loved ones death, and asked everyone in the gathering to recite the durood for 100 or a million times and transfer the rewards to the deceased??? Can such a self-invented rite or ritual which is not endorsed by the Messenger of Allah be considered a part of worship in Islam??? Will such a rite be acceptable to Allah Subhanah as worship???
- Offering of nafl or supererogatory prayers is considered a great virtue in Islam.. lets say someone invented a rite or ritual and called upon a gathering at a loved ones death, and asked everyone in the gathering to offer a 100 or a million rakahs of nafl prayers and transfer the rewards to the deceased??? Can such a self-invented rite or ritual which is not endorsed by the Messenger of Allah be considered a part of worship in Islam??? Will such a rite be acceptable to Allah Subhanah as worship???
Just as one cannot fast, or recite the durood, or offer salaah and transfer the rewards of their acts of worship to the deceased.one cannot recite the Quran and transfer the rewards of their recitation to the deceased!
This rite or ritual of calling and gathering people for a khatam quran at the death of a loved one or for any other reason is not endorsed by the Messenger of Allah (saws); and any act or rite or ritual of worship which is not endorsed by the Messenger of Allah (saws) cannot be from his (saws) Sunnah.and if the rite or ritual is not from the Sunnah, then it has to be nothing but a self-invented innovationand innovations in the form of worship have absolutely no place in the pure and perfect deen of Al-Islam!
One only needs to imagine what would be the state of Islam if anyone and everyone were to start innovating their own rites and rituals of worship in the deen! The deen of Islam would lose its simplicity and purity, and become a concoction of self-invented and innovated rites and rituals. Every birthday and every death day of every loved one would have a ritual associated with it; every anniversary of the birth or death day of a Prophet or a pious slave of Allah would have a ritual associated with it; every marriage of every believer would have a ritual attached to it; etc. etc..so much emphasis would be put on these self-invented rituals, that a time would come when the following of the deen would become a burden if one were to fulfill all the rituals associated with every occasion!
The people who received the Divine Scriptures before us did exactly the same thing with their deen until their deen became a celebration and commemoration of rituals like Christmas, and Easter, and Good Friday, and Baptism, and Confessions, and Haluka, and Passover, etc. etc. until they became astray from their true faith!
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 7 Surah Aaraaf verse 157:
(So, now mercy has been assigned to those) who follow this Messenger, the Gentile Prophet (Mohamed (saws)), whose mention they shall find in the Torah and the Gospel with them. He enjoins them to do good and forbids them from evil; he makes pure things lawful for them and impure things unlawful; he relieves them of their burdens and frees them from the shackles (of rites and rituals) that bound them. For this reason, those alone who believe in him, support him, succour him, and follow the Light that has been sent down with him shall attain true success.
The Question: Actually, this is subsequent to my discussion with you. I do believe in Khatams etc, so does my husband. The point that he made is if you can make Hajj for a Marhoom (deceased), why not duaas. So, how or why is Hajj permitted for Marhooms. How does the sawaab of Hajj reaches, and not the sawaab of Quran.
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 9.418 Narrated by Ibn Abbas
A woman came to the Prophet (saws) and said, "My mother vowed to perform the Hajj but she died before performing it. Should I perform the Hajj on her behalf?" He (saws) said, "Yes! Perform the Hajj on her behalf. See, if your mother had been in debt, would you have paid her debt?" She said, "Yes." He (saws) said, "So you should pay what is for Him, as Allah has more right that one should fulfill one's obligations to Him."
The Qeustion: So, how or why is Hajj permitted for Marhooms.
The reason one who is alive can do Hajj (or Umrah) pilgrimage for their deceased loved ones in Islam is because the MESSENGER OF ALLAH (SAWS) ALLOWED AND ENDORSED IT.
But lets say, the deceased parent, or relative or loved one died a non-muslim! Would a Hajj done by their believing heirs or loved ones be acceptable as their worship to Allah Subhanah? - No
Or lets say the person who died was an evil muslim, did not fear Allah, did not pray, did not fast, did not care for the lawful and the unlawfuland if he had wanted to, he could very well have done the Hajj himself, but he chose not to do and died in that state. Allah blessed the off-spring of this person to be a good muslim. Would the Hajj done by this righteous off-spring for his loved one be acceptable to Allah? - No
Or one was pious and righteous, and desired and intended and vowed to go to the obligatory Hajj pilgrimage, but died before they could fulfill their intention. An off-spring or loved one of this deceased person wishes to fulfill the desire and intention of their deceased loved one and performs a Hajj-e-badal for them, begging Allah Subhanah to accept it as a fulfillment of the intention and vow of the deceased. This is the Hajj which would be acceptable to Allah Subhanah.
The Question: How does the sawaab of Hajj reaches, and not the sawaab of Quran.
There are three types of worship in Islam:
- the worship which one does with ones own self: salaah, fasts, recitation of the Quran, etc.
- the worship which one does with ones wealth: charity, sadaqa, zakah, etc.
- the worship which one does with a combination of ones wealth and ones self: pilgrimage of Hajj and Umrah, sacrifice, etc.
In light of the guidance of the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah (saws), the worships which constitute wealth, or a combination of wealth and self can be transferred to the deceased, provided the deceased willed, or desired, or intended, or vowed to do so, but their appointment of death overtook them before they could fulfill their intention or vow.
But the worship which one does with ones own self like salaah, recitation of Quran, etc. cannot be done and transferred to another, regardless of whether one willed or requested their heirs to do so or not! One cannot ask another to pray their salaah for them, or recite the Quran for them, or observe their fasts for themthese worships are the responsibility of each individual.
The Question: Having Kuran Khani etc. for a deceased is no gunaah. Should anyone die in the family, I will have it. It is acceptable religion wise as well as socially - as you mentioned it can be served as a gathering point and all of us gather to grieve the dead (you do believe that we should go to do taaziyat for the deceased), so why not gather and pray. Praying is never forbidden - in a group or otherwise.
When one amongst the noble companions or family members of the Prophet (saws) passed away, the absolute first thing the Prophet (saws) would do upon hearing the news would be to declare the statement: Inna lillahe wa inna ilayhe rajeoon (From Allah we have come, and to Him Alone is our return).
The next thing the Prophet (saws) would do is prepare to give their deceased brother/sister in faith an honorable burial and encouraged the believers to participate for the burial prayers and sincerely seek forgiveness for them in their supplications.
He (saws) encouraged the believers to visit the bereaved family of the deceased and encouraged that close friends and neighbors provide food for the immediate family, preferably for a period of three days.
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 2.371 Narrated by Zainab bint Abi Salama
I went to Um Habiba, the wife of Prophet (saws), who said, "I heard the Prophet (saws) saying, 'It is not lawful for a woman who believes in Allah and the Last Day to mourn for any dead person for more than three days, except for her husband, (for whom she should mourn) for four months and ten days'."
The Messenger of Allah (saws) guided that it was not lawful for the believers to mourn for any deceased for more than three days except for a widow, whose period of mourning is four months and ten days. It is encouraged that the believers visit the bereaved family members of the deceased during this period, provide them with food, share in their grief, guide them towards patience and constancy, and help them in whatever way possible.
When his father, Jaffar ibn Abi Taalib (r.a.) was martyred, his son Abdullah ibn Ja'far (r.a.) reported that the Messenger of Allah (saws) said: "Prepare some food for the family of Ja'far, for what has befallen them is keeping them preoccupied."
Related by Abu Daw'ud, Ibn Majah and Tirmidhi,
Fiqh-us-Sunnah Fiqh 4.23a
All the schools of Islamic law disapprove of the deceased's family preparing food for the people coming to pay their condolences, for it adds to their grief and further encumbers them unnecessarily. Such a practice would also resemble the custom of the Arabs before Islam (in the Days of Ignorance). Referring to this practice, Jarir says: "(In the days of ignorance before Islam) we considered it a part of mourning to assemble at the deceased's house and prepare food after burial for those gathered there." Some scholars consider this ritual to be absolutely forbidden.
The Statement: Having Kuran Khani etc. for a deceased is no gunaah.
Following a Sunnah is a virtue, following a bida is definitely a sin, and without an iota of a doubt, the self-invented and innovated ritual of Quran Khatam or Khaani is a bida and an innovation which finds absolutely no mention in the authentic and established Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah (saws).
The statement: Should anyone die in the family, I will have it.
After being made aware that something is an innovation or bida and does not constitute a part of Islam, and one still insists on following it, then one should prepare for the accounting of their deed in defiance of the Sunnah in the Court of Allah Subhanah on an Inevitable Day.
The Statement: It is acceptable religion wise as well as socially
Such innovations may be acceptable in an ignorant society and pagan religions.but Allah is our witness sister, such innovated rituals have no place, basis, or authority or acceptability in the pure and perfect deen of Islam as brought and practiced by the Messenger of Allah (saws) and all those who sincerely wish to follow him.
The statement: Praying is never forbidden - in a group or otherwise.
It is not the praying or the recitation of the Quran which is forbidden.but it is the form and the manner and the ritual which is formed where this praying takes place, and the intention of transferring the rewards to the deceased from the praying in this innovated ritual which is forbidden in Islam.
The Statement: Also, I clarified with two people (fairly knowledgeable ones - ), and they confirmed that you can pray for the dead, but through the wasila of our Pyare Nabi (and please don`t pounce on me yet - we are not asking for from the Prophet, but through the wasila) and pray for our Nabi first, all Muslims, and then pray for our beloved deceased. And it is acceptable - and this has been confirmed by Aalims as well.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 134:
They were a people who passed away. They shall receive the reward of what they earned, and you shall have the reward of what you will earn. And you will not be questioned as to what they did.
Dear and beloved sister, the principle or usool in Islam is that neither can one be punished for the sins of another; nor can one be rewarded for the good deeds of another.each soul shall enjoy the fruits of ones own toil.
Dear and beloved sister in Islam, it is neither lawful nor an approved practice in Islam to make supplication to the Lord Most High and implore Him to give one something for the sake of someone else. Never ever did the Messenger of Allah (saws) implore or beseech Allah Subhanah to give him something for the sake of the Noble Prophets or anyone else who went before him; nor did the noble companions of the Prophet (saws) ever make supplication to the Lord Most Gracious to grant them something or forgive them their sins for the sake of their beloved Prophet Mohamed (saws) or anyone else; nor did the Messenger of Allah (saws) ever advocate or propagate this form of making supplications.
Although it is not permissible in Islam to beseech Allah Subhanah to give them something or forgive them their sins for the sake of someone else; what is permitted in Islam when making supplications to the Lord is that one invoke their Lord Most Gracious by referring to some amongst their own good or best deeds..it is expected that such supplications will find acceptance with the Lord Most Merciful.
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 3.472 Narrated by Abdullah bin Umar
I heard Allah's Messenger (saws) saying, "Three men from among those who were before you, set out together till they reached a cave at night and entered it. A big rock rolled down the mountain and closed the mouth of the cave. They said (to each other), nothing could save you from this rock but to invoke Allah by giving referenda to the righteous deed which you have done (for Allah's sake only).' So, one of them said, 'O Allah! I had old parents and I never provided my family (wife, children etc.) with milk before them. One day, by chance I was delayed, and I came late (at night) while my parents had slept. I milked the sheep for them and took the milk to them, but I found them sleeping. I disliked to provide my family with the milk before them. I waited for them and the bowl of milk was in my hand and I kept on waiting for them to get up till the day dawned. Then they got up and drank the milk. O Allah! If I did that for Your sake only, please relieve us from our critical situation caused by this rock.' So, the rock shifted a little but they could not get out."
The Prophet (saws) added, "The second man said, 'O Allah! I had a cousin who was the dearest of all people to me and I wanted to have sexual relations with her but she refused. Later she had a hard time in a famine year and she came to me and I gave her one-hundred-and-twenty Dinars on the condition that she would not resist my desire, and she agreed. When I was about to fulfill my desire, she said: It is unlawful for you to outrage my chastity except by legitimate marriage. So, I thought it a sin to have sexual intercourse with her and left her though she was the dearest of all the people to me, and also I left the gold I had given her. O Allah! If I did that for Your Sake only, please relieve us from the present calamity.' So, the rock shifted a little more but still they could not get out from there."
The Prophet (saws) added, "Then the third man said, 'O Allah! I employed few laborers and I paid them their wages with the exception of one man who did not take his wages and went away. I invested his wages and I got much property thereby. (Then after some time) he came and said to me: O Allah's slave! Pay me my wages. I said to him: All the camels, cows, sheep and slaves you see, are yours. He said: O Allah's slave! Don't mock at me. I said: I am not mocking at you. So, he took all the herd and drove them away and left nothing. O Allah! If I did that for Your Sake only, please relieve us from the present suffering.' So, that rock shifted completely and they got out walking.
A similitude of asking Allah for something through the wasila or sake of Prophet Mohamed (saws) would be for an employee to ask his boss to give him a raise because this person knows the bosss friend, or wife, or son, or a loved oneand for their sake the boss cannot refuse his request, for he would then lose face with his friend, or wife, or son, etc.!
The similitude of asking Allah for something because of a good righteous deed they have themselves done in their past, is like an employee asking his boss to give him a raise because of the extra work he has done for the boss or his company.
The Lord Most Merciful appointed His Prophet (saws) to declare His Message to mankind, and teach them the deeds and way of life which will earn them the Pleasure of the Lord.not to use His blessed Prophets (saws) name to force or influence Allah Subhanah to give them what their heart desires!
A boss sends his messenger to an employee to give him a message to do these jobs, and the employee goes back to the boss and says give me a raise or such and such a thing for the sake of your messenger!!!
The Statement: When we pray for the deceased, what happens is their barzak becomes easier, the azaab lessens. Of course, your own good deed will take priority.
The Messenger of Allah (saws) time and again encouraged the believers to make supplications for their deceased believing brothers and sisters in faith; for the sincere supplications of a believer does indeed benefit their deceased brothers and sisters in faith.
Buraidah reported: "The Prophet (saws) taught us that when we visited graves we should say, 'Peace be upon you, O believing men and women, O dwellers of this place. Certainly, Allah willing, we will join you. You have preceded us and we are to follow you. We supplicate to Allah to grant us and you security'.''
Reported by Muslim and Ahmad.
Ibn 'Abbas reported: "Once the Prophet (saws) passed by graves in Madinah. He (saws) tumed his face toward them saying: 'Peace be upon you, O dwellers of these graves. May Allah forgive us and you. You have preceded us, and we are following your trail'."
Related by Tirmidhi.
'Aishah reported: "I asked: 'What should I say when I pass by a graveyard, O Messenger of Allah (saws)?' He (saws) replied, 'Say, "Peace be upon the believing men and women dwelling here. May Allah grant mercy to those who have preceded us and those who are to follow them. Certainly, Allah willing, we will join you"'."
Related by Muslim.
Islam also guides the believers to offer a funeral prayer for their deceased believing brother/sister in faith, and make supplications to Allah for them:
Abu Hurairah said: The Prophet (saws) prayed in one of the funeral prayers: "Oh Allah ! You are her Sustainer, You are her Creator, You provided her with sustenance, guided her to Islam, caused her to die, and You best know her secret and public life. We plead to You to forgive her sins."
Wa'ilah ibn al-Asqa reported: "The Prophet (saws) led us in a funeral prayer for a man from among the Muslims. I heard him (saws) saying: 'O Allah! So-and-so, son of so-and-so, is under Your protection and mercy, so protect him from the trial of the grave and the torture of Hell Fire. You are the Guardian of the truthful and the faithful. OAllah! Forgive him and be merciful to him, as You are the Most Merciful, Most Forgiving'."
Related by Ahmad and Abu Daw'ud.
Awf ibn Malik reported: "I heard the Prophet (saws) while offering a funeral prayer, say: 'O Allah! Forgive him, have mercy on him, pardon him, heal him, be generous to him, cause his entrance to be wide and comfortable, wash him with the most pure and clean water, and purify him from sins as a white garment is washed clean of dirt. Give him in exchange a home better than his home (on earth) and a family better than his family, and a wife better than his wife, and protect him from the trial of the grave and the torture of Hell Fire'."
Related by Muslim.
Abu Hurairah reported that the Prophet (saws) offered a funeral prayer and said: "O Allah! Forgive our living, our dead, our young, our old, our males and our females, those of us who are present, and those who are absent. O Allah! Whomsoever among us You keep to live, make him to live in Islam, and whomsoever You cause to die, let him die in faith. O Allah! Do not deprive us of our reward for (supplicating for) him, and cause us not to go astray after him."
Related by Ahmad.
One may make as many sincere supplications one wills for their deceased loved one, for nothing benefits a deceased more than the supplications their believing brothers make for them.
But one should understand that there is a huge difference between making supplications for the deceased, and reciting the Quran and trying to transfer the rewards of their act towards the deceased!
The Statement: See sister, you should not believe at face value what the Arabs say
We absolutely agree with you on this statementbut with a little alteration!
One should indeed not take at face value or believe what our Arab brethren (or one belonging to any other race or color or nation) may say regarding the permissibility/impermissibility or lawful/unlawful in Islam.but take at face value, believe with absolute conviction, unconditionally trust, follow and obey in religion only what was said, done, and endorsed by that one humble, orphan, illiterate, desert Arab, the son of Abdullah ibn Abdul Muttalib, the slave-servant of Allah..Mohamed ar-Rasool Allah (saws) said and didfor Allah is our witness brother, any who does that, will never ever go astray from the Straight Path!
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisa verse 79-80:
We have sent you (O Mohamed (saws)) as a Messenger to mankind, and Allahs witness suffices for this. Whoever obeys the Messenger, in fact obeys Allah, and whoever turns away from him, he will be accountable for his deeds. Anyhow, we have not sent you (O Mohamed (saws)) to be a guardian over them.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah Ale Imran verse 31-32:
O Prophet (saws), tell the people, If you sincerely love Allah, follow me. Then Allah will love you and forgive you your sins, for He is All Forgiving, All Merciful. Also say to them, Obey Allah and His Messenger. And if, in spite of this, they do not accept your invitation, warn them that Allah does not love those, who refuse to obey Him and His Messenger.
The Statement: a very good example is the applying of nail polish when praying. Most Arabs do that ( at least the ones I have seen - bahrain and canada). If your nail is covered in a film of polish, the wudu is void. But most Arabs do it, it does not mean it is right and we can emulate them.
Indeed one amongst the obligatory conditions of wudu in Islam is to wash ones hands in such a way that no part of it must remain dry. The nail-polish, when applied on the nails does not allow water to touch the nails, which would indeed make the wudu invalid; and a prayer done with an invalid wudu would obviously not be valid. But if the woman does the wudu first, and then applies the nail-polish, there is absolutely no harm in her offering her prayers.
If as you say most Arab women apply nail polish and then do the wudu, and Allah Alone Knows Best if that is indeed what our sisters do, then indeed their wudu, and thus their prayers done in that invalid wudu would not be valid.
The Statement: I guess people want this khatams etc. discouraged, in order to encourage being self sufficient naeki wise, and not rely on other people.
Beloved sister, Islam indeed guides that one can have nothing except what he himself strives for, and that no bearer of burdens can or will bear the burden of another! Islam indeed guides that one seek to be self-sufficient of all except Allah Subhanah, their Lord, Creator and Sustainer.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 53 Surah Najm verses 38-41:
38 Namely that no bearer of burdens can bear the burden of another;
39 That man can have nothing but what he strives for;
40 That (the fruit of) his striving will soon come in sight;
41 Then will he be rewarded with a reward complete.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 6 Surah Anaam verse 164:
164 Say: ". Every soul draws the meed of its acts on none but itself: no bearer of burdens can bear the burden of another. Your goal in the end is toward Allah: He will tell you the truth of the things wherein ye disputed.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 17 Surah Israa verse 15:
15 Who receiveth guidance receiveth it for his own benefit: who goeth astray doth so to his own loss: no bearer of burdens can bear the burden of another.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 39 Surah Zumar verse 7:
7 It ye reject (Allah) truly Allah has no need of you; but He liketh not ingratitude from His servants: if ye are grateful He is pleased with you. No bearer of burdens can bear the burden of another. In the end to your Lord is your return when He will tell you the truth of all that ye did (in this life). For He knoweth well all that is in (men's) hearts.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 99 Surah Zalzalah verses 6-8:
6 On that Day will men proceed in companies sorted out to be shown the Deeds that they (had done).
7 Then shall anyone who has done an atom's weight of good see it!
8 And anyone who has done an atom's weight of evil shall see it.
It is precisely when man seeks help and succor from others for his salvation that he stops doing deeds himself, but starts looking for a Messiah to forgive him his sins, or invents a (I seek refuge in Allah from even uttering this!) a son of God to forgive them their sins, or seeks the help of saints, and peers, and fakirs, and maulanas, and dargahs, and tombs, and shrines, etc. to attain salvation!
Islam guides its followers to believe and strive to do good righteous deeds themselves in accordance with the guidance sent to them if they indeed desire salvation, and depend on none in creation for their salvation except the Mercy of their Lord Most Merciful.
The Statement: Also, all in all, if the sawaab does not reach the dead, it will be retained for you, so what the heck, just pray, and in a group it is faster and even those people who don`t normally pray, will pray at such times.
Beloved brother, thisand I reiteratethis mentality and intention is the very fallacy through which the Shaytaan makes every bida or innovation seem fair-seeming and justified!
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 29 Surah Ankaboot verse 38:
Shaitaan made their deeds fair-seeming to them and misled them from the Right Path, although they were sensible people.
Worship which is acceptable to Allah is the worship which one does with ones heart and soul, in absolute and total awe, fear, humility and hope of the Mercy of the Lord Most Merciful.worship that is done with an inattentive heart, or because one is forced to do it because everyone else is doing it, or one does it only as a show to others, etc.such worship has absolutely no value or worth in the Sight of Allah Subhanah!
Worship is not worship until it is done for the Pleasure and Sake of Allah Subhanah Alone! What if one were to observe the worship of fast with the belief that if the worship finds no acceptance with Allah, at least he would lose some weight! Or what if one were to offer their prayers with the belief that if the worship does not find acceptance with Allah, at least it is a good form of aerobic exercise!
If one who normally never recites or strives to learn or follow the Quran, but turns up at the house of the deceased and recites the Quran only because everyone is doing it and they would look odd not doing so, thus he recites it for show; or one believes it is faster to recite the Quran in a group, etc..can one who sincerely fears Allah and the Last Day honestly say that such a worship will bring any benefit or reward to him, leave alone have some left over to be transferred to the soul of the deceased!!!!
Dear and beloved sister in Islam, we really and sincerely apologize if the answer has become too lengthy.but these self-invented rites and rituals of innovations are such a curse, and such a grave sin in the Sight of Allahthat if one is not careful, it spreads like a plague in society and they start representing and becoming a part of the deen to the unsuspecting believers! These innovations take on such importance and significance that a person is ready to leave and sacrifice everything, but he cannot break himself free from the burdens and shackles of these self-innovated innovations.so much so that a time comes when the true believers who sincerely wish to follow the Quran and the Sunnah and shun and abstain from innovations are regarded as out-castes, irreligious, blasphemous, and sacrilegious!!!
May Allah Subhanah have mercy on the believers, and give them the wisdom, the courage, the knowledge, and the conviction to accept unconditionally in religion only what is declared in the Glorious Quran and the Sunnah, and abstain from every innovation which is put forth by the ignorant in this pure and perfect and simple deen of Islam. Ameen.
If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any other guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of being led astray.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,