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Cast / community difference while Christian sister marrying Muslim man

Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

 Am a Christian am in love with a Muslim ..he loves me endlessly ... We both love each other so much that we don't know how to live apart from each other... However marriage seems impossible because of religion... I am happily willing to convert to be a Muslim inshallah ....
but yet his family looks for the same cast as his which I will not have even if I convert...how am I to convince them to accept me after converting... Please help me I feel so helpless..,
i love him so much but why does a cast have to keep us away.. Has subahnallah said anything about cast in the Quran.. I would love to know...please reply me as soon as possible...Salem waleikum....

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Answer:

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

 If one reverts to Islam then there is no restriction whatsoever in marrying. The restriction applies only when one marries a pagan. A Muslim man is permitted to marry the people of the Book (Christians and Jews) even if they do not revert to Islam.

 
Having said that, a parent will always wish their ward to marry from amongst their own community. This is because there will always be a lot of adjustment to be made by all concerned when an alien enters the family. Wherein from the community the girl and the boy are aware of what is expected from them. This has nothing to do with Islam per se, it is common to all mankind.
 
Falling in love is fine, but you should be aware of the realities in life. After marriage if you don't comply with your in-laws expectations, huge conflicts can arise to make the love fly fast out of the window. This has happened millions of times to those couples who did not take out time to think and contemplate. Remember marriage is never between two individuals, it is between two families in particular and two communities in general.
 
If your in-laws are not approving, you should beware and not get into this relationship for your own sanity. There is no way the boy is going to take your side against his parents and family and that is the time you are going to feel terribly alienated and disappointed.
 
If you want your marriage to work, then take the trouble of working with your in-laws now. Get to know them better, confide in them and earn their confidence. If they give their blessings then only marry or otherwise you are better off not marrying this guy. You should in reality fall in love with your in-laws totally before marrying this man.
 

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Members of Islamhelpline


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